Most state laws allow the court to consider a child’s preference on which parent’s home will be the child’s primary residence after the child reaches a certain age—often 12-14 years of age.

But the court usually does not have to follow the child’s preference. Generally, the older the child is, the more deference will be given to the child’s choice on which parent’s home will be the child’s primary residence.

The law on this issue is usually found in your state’s statutes—often in the statutes grouped together and called the family code.

In New Jersey, the court takes into account a child's preference regarding which parent's home will be the primary residence after a divorce or separation, but this is just one of many factors considered. New Jersey does not have a specific age at which a child's preference is given more weight, but as a general rule, the older and more mature the child, the more consideration the court will give to their preference. The child's preference is not determinative, meaning the court is not obligated to follow it. Instead, the court will evaluate the child's best interests based on a variety of factors outlined in the New Jersey Statutes, specifically within the family code under N.J.S.A. 9:2-4. These factors include the child's needs, the stability of each parent's home environment, the quality and continuity of the child's education, the fitness of each parent, the geographical proximity of the parents' homes, the extent and quality of the time spent with the child prior to or subsequent to the separation, the parents' employment responsibilities, and the age and number of children. The court's primary concern is to ensure the child's health, safety, and welfare when making a custody determination.